a douchebag and his dossier through his lense, words and music
in fighting his demons
sometimes the key to making progress is to recognise how to take that very first step. then you start your journey.
you hope for the best, and you stick with it day in day out. even if you are tired, even if you want to walk away, you dont.
overcoming addiction. russell brand.
its been too long.
end of last year i went to urbanscapes to catch yuna, and i wanted to prove to myself and to others that there are as much excitement out there on my home turf.
the big boys ruled and played by the rule. areas were barricaded where they were present with signages that ‘you’ are not allowed in. a bigot was playing god, dismissing people of certain labels, in this case dismissing our own from entering into the only area in the entire field where people could relax.
i fucking hate it. there i said it. sexists, racists, extremists. you create this community and society.
4 private posts since my last:
#1: October 9th
Today I feel sad, through my belongings,
To keep, to throw, of the things no one understands.
I cant let go.
Crawling into a cupboard,
Lie down on the bottom shelf,
Leaving the door open,
Lying down on the carpeted floor,
Chest down, legs & arms wide open.
While I was packing in the office, among the notebooks flipped read: “drunken words are sober thoughts. Listen carefully.”
I cant remember when I wrote that and why. And how far is this true.
Melancholy all around. I’m hoarding. I’m going home to be reminded of thing I forgot. But I don’t want to forget the person I have become. And I hope the things I am keeping with me will remind me of who I am right now.
My last private entry since then was October 17th, wondering on a saying that goes; people say if the person that crossed your path is your kind of person, you are bound to meet again twice. And I was worried that I have used up my quotas and misses them.
Well I headed up north last year end and met up with 2 friends which I’ve technically only met once just 2 months since I left The Netherlands. And I have met up with Andy just a month ago since he was in town for business. So one thing for sure is that the new chapter had begun. So lets try not to forget why I am here.
Only time will tell.
I am back.
life is like a never ending movie. you’re on a plane listening to something familiar and you realised your happily ever after is not just around the corner.
disturbed, angry, who made you feel like this? again.
your selfish self won’t allow you to let this control your life.
what is one to do?
if only there was a song that brings me back to barcelona because i can still feel you hong kong. xx
i was at 2 of my dear friends’ wedding down south of france. i had an amazing time. blessed to be hosted by such kind hearted people. some just more than others.